After diagnosis.

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Yesterday Gareth and I were invited to an after diagnosis talk (forced selfie above) at the child assessment unit- CADU.

We were asked how Teddie was and if we had any questions- Of course, I had some questions.

  • Is a specialist school right for Teddie at this stage?
  • EHCP related issues
  • Anxiety related problems  

I would like to say our questions were answered but felt that we were slightly pushed towards other agencies rather than answering the questions herself.

In a nutshell, the meeting was to hand out leaflets and be told, Teddie is now getting discharged from the unit. It honestly felt like we’d waited for 17 months to be seen, get a diagnosis then handed some leaflet and wished good luck.

What we would have prefered was an honest talk where someone tells us they understand what we are going through. I wanted someone to say it’s bloody hard work and some days are going to be worse than others but we will get through it.

For us, we weren’t really after much help but it made me realise that other parents might need it so below is our honest parent ASD tips.

Parents top tips

The autism spectrum is a wide one, what works for one child may not work for another- in fact, what works for Teddie one day may be obsolete the next.

As autism parents, we needed to deal with Teddie diagnosis before we could help him, we needed to fully understand everything in order to make sure Teddie has everything the world has to offer.

Parenting an autistic child can be challenging at times but we honestly wouldn’t have our Bear any other way! 

To my beautiful Bear.

 

 

To my beautiful Bear.
 

This morning wasn’t a good day for either of us, I hate to see the beautiful eyes of yours filled with tears.

You tell me you’re sad and you wanted to stay with mummy but I still took you to school, I took you because I know how much you love it.
 
You have no idea why you are feeling the way you feel, I can only imagine how that must feel, you just know something isn’t right.
 
I tell you mummy loves you every day because I really do. when I ask you if you love mummy sometimes you say No or like last night you said; 
 
“Eyebrows, nose, eye’s, mouth” while touching my face.
 
You tell me you love mummy in your own way- like when you put both your hands on my face and just look at me or when you hug me for no reason.
 
You may never say the words “I love you” you may not even fully understand the concept of love but I know you do love me, I see it in your eyes every day.
 
You didn’t want to take your favourite PJ’s off this morning, mummy knows how much they mean to you. 
I know how much you love being at home if you had your way you would never leave the house but you have to baby.
 
I heard you screaming out my name as I left when you went out the room, I didn’t want to leave you, I left you because you work better when mummy isn’t with you.
 
Mummy would never leave you unless I knew you would be ok, you just needed to break the cycle of the last few days.
 
Mummy will always be your voice, I will always stand up for you and I will always love you.
Know that we all love our Bear and wouldn’t have you any other way!
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Snow days aren’t always fun days……

Well, we weren’t expecting snow in March that’s for certain!

It honestly feels like half term but without the added expensive, other than the boys eating us out of house & home.

Having snow is very much like the hottest day of the year (other then it being the coldest) everyone heads over the county park for hours of fun, but for us we haven’t been able to join.

It’s taken Teddie 4 days to go out in the snow, even when Gareth & I had a snowball fight in the garden with Harvey & Alfie Teddie wasn’t bothered in the slightest. Teddie’s fear of getting wet overrides the enjoyment of having fun in the snow.

Walking to school on Monday brought a challenge in itself. Teddie had new school shoes but wouldn’t allow them to get wet so we walked in his wellies- which is fine I hear you cry, however Teddie will not allow you to change his shoes once he’s at school, new or old ones.

We have spent the week segmenting phonics using alphablock pec cards, drawing, crying, and eating half a ton of bread!

This morning Teddie saw I was getting his pants and socks out, he came up close to me and said;

“Teddie stay with bubby (mummy)”

Having even a few days off school I fear we will be back to square one with his transition. The first day back to school after half term is normally fine but Tuesday onwards he’s normally very unsettled, this could possibly be the same next week.

Cabin fever has certain set in, I haven’t been able to get anything done as Teddie likes the laptop on, only Godsend is he never wants the Tv on!

I am well and truly over the snow, I’d like to be able to leave the village without fear of not getting back in but most of all I need the routine back for Teddie.

Leaving the house has always been a battle for Teddie if he had his way he’d stay at home in his rocket PJ’s all day every day!

We love our Bear and wouldn’t have him any other way!